Friday, June 10, 2011

This Happy Life of Mine

"I think I'm in love" watercolor by RosieMusic

I'm really, really happy, you guys.

Sometimes, with everything going on in my life (the stresses of work, weight woes, this never-ending winter), it's easy to forget how truly fulfilled and blessed I am to have gotten as far as I have and to be in the place I am now.  The last three years post-college have been a very scary, frustrating, and emotional journey, which makes right now all the more remarkable.

I am madly, hopelessly, irrevocably in love with an incredible man.  Even more remarkable: he is in love with me.  These are the most significant and important facts in my life.  Not to say that it's always easy (it's not) or that I think it can't get better (it will), but the knowledge of this love throws me into a tailspin of joy each and every day.  Even if I'm not showing it, I'm feeling it.  Sometimes, I just can't contain it and I feel as though I'm going to burst.

How could weather or weight or worries ever overshadow a happiness as intense and real as this?  Though, I admit, I often have to remind myself not to let negative thoughts take me over...

Recently, my friend Shannon of Toes Over the Edge wrote a blog post that poses some issues and questions I think so many 20-something, post-college grads can understand.  Unless you graduated from college with a clear career path and a monster starting salary, you're probably feeling a little lost as to where you're going to be in five or ten years.  What am I going to do with my life?  Didn't I have the answer to this just three short years ago?  Or did I ever really have the answer?  How have things gone so awry?  Can I really be happy without a plan for the future?

I have Shannon's questions to thank for me coming to my own conclusion about these issues in my life.  In sharing with her my "outsiders" perspective, I realized that the very same advice needed to be applied to my me; I needed to readjust the way I prioritize what is most important in living a healthy and happy life.

If you're struggling with similar questions, ask yourself these questions: When am I not happy?  What am I thinking about that causes me stress or worry?  What happens if I stop thinking about or doing those things?

As I told Shannon, I only seem to be stressed about my present and future when a) I think about where I once imagined I'd be now, and b) I compare my life to other people my age who seem "further along" in their lives than me.  When I'm not wrapped up in this useless crap, I'm happy.  And why shouldn't I be?  My past and other people's lives do not affect mine, and I am grateful for every joy (and obstacle) that comes my way.

Because it's brought me here.

Jon and I are in the process of setting up an amazing life together.  We have the world's most awesome dogs, the coolest kitten, and a cute little apartment that we've decorated and planned out as a team.  We dream the same dreams for our future, and we enjoy the same silly and exciting things in our day-to-day life.  We talk about everything... all the time.

Also, I am fortunate enough to have the same best friends now that I did when I was in high school, who are all smart and talented and, most importantly, know me for who I really am.  I have a job that I don't hate, a little cash in the bank, and a family who has been nothing but supportive of me through all the difficult and exceptional times.

Despite the uncertainty about my fickle little future, I'm happier now than I've ever been.  And if you ask me, that's progress.

"I Like You..." print by LuciusArt


  1. This blog just made me worry a little bit less and realize that I'm not the only one feeling this way. Thank you!
    Oh, by the way..
    you got a kitten?!

  2. Love your blogs. Even at 50 I feel this way.....just be Happy!